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Archive for the ‘Self Improvement’ Category

nevitably in life we will face disapproval or rejection from others. Maybe a family member, friend, employer, or even strangers. You may not agree with the way we live our lives, the decisions that we take for ourselves, or even who we are. You can not underestimate our dream, our goal to criticize or make insulting comments that express a low opinion of us. This experience can be very painful, because we all love and want to be accepted. We all want to be supported and encouraged and loved by the people around us.

Rejected or ridiculed by other (especially if it is often the case) may result in us our own worth and dignity as a person question. We began to wonder if maybe they’re right. Maybe we are not loved enough or talented enough or good enough to be acceptable. Following this line of thinking for a long time very harmful to our self-confidence.

While it’s normal to have a few moments of uncertainty when we are rejected, the worst thing we can do is internalize the negativity we recieve from others. Just because someone has a low opinion of us does not mean we have to accept it as our truth. They can only come to their conclusions by looking at us from the outside. They don’t feel our feelings, think our thoughts, or experience the things we have in our lives. They are seeing us from a completely different perspective than our own.

To complicate matters even further, their own life experiences, thoughts, and feelings can easily be projected onto us, so they may see something that doesn’t truly exist, except in their own mind.

So, how do we overcome this? How do we avoid letting other people’s negativity erode our belief in ourselves? There are three major points to keep in mind:

1) Reinforcement = Strength. Think of positive thoughts as the antidote to any negativity that comes your way. Feed your mind empowering, positive thoughts daily, preferably several times a day – and most especially after you encounter negativity from another. The stronger you can build up your belief in yourself, the less you will care about others who insult you, ridicule you, or reject you. You won’t be looking to others for your sense of validation or approval, because you will already have your OWN approval.

2) Conserve Your Energy. While it might be tempting to try to explain, defend, or prove yourself to someone who rejects you, this is usually a waste of your time and energy. Once someone forms an opinion of you, they are unlikely to change it. The more you try to change their minds, the more stubbornly they will dig their heels in and resist. So, simply release your need to prove yourself and accept that they are entitled to their opinions. Their comments and opinions cannot detract from your belief in yourself, unless you allow them to.

3) Limit Your Exposure. Once a person reveals their negative opinion or directs hurtful comments your way, you might want to avoid spending excessive time with them in the future. This becomes more difficult if it is a family member that you can’t just shut out of your life completely. But you can still set boundaries and limit the amount of time you are faced with negativity.

Finally, remember that no one else can define you, or live your life for you, or take away the beauty and uniqueness that is you. They may try, but they won’t be successful unless you allow it.

If you instead choose to turn away from the negativity and focus on building a solid foundation of belief in yourself, the negative comments will cease to matter to you. You will go on to create a fulfilling, successful life that reflects exactly who you are, regardless of what others say or do.

I am someone who has successfully stop smoking, it takes a lot of determination and will power, there is a period where I seemed to be desperate and angry one cigarette cravings only last, but somehow I could not refuse. In this article I will some suggestions on how I successfully managed the bad habits and unhealthy, a proposal which I hope to help others to stop also stop.

I have tried many times to quit smoking and always failed after a few days. What should I do is try to figure out why the previous efforts have failed and hopefully learn from my mistakes. In my new journey to quit smoking, I need a new approach from what I have ever had in the past, an approach that can lead to success than failure of the normal.

I decided that I would only try again to stop smoking, when my life was in what I classed as a good period. I am the kind of person who easily becomes stressed and I can make the slightest problem seem like the biggest disaster. When I feel that things are not going well in my life, cigarettes become like my friend. At least I have something to look forward to do in that day, smoking. When I am doing well and am happy, I have far less of a need to smoke, therefore this will be the type of period, when I will start yet again to quit the fags.

When attempting to stop smoking in the past, I have always told everybody. This is a big mistake as to quit it is important that you stop thinking about cigarettes completely. When you are constantly being asked about how you are finding giving up the cigarettes, it is like a constant reminder to you. By going about it in a quiet way, maybe only telling your closest family members and friends, makes it a whole lot easier.

As well as quitting smoking, I also decided to seriously reduce my intake of alcohol. When I had failed in the past, it was normally because I had been drunk and could no longer bat away the voices in my head that were telling me to smoke. The alcohol weakened my resolve and increased the amount and severity of the cravings. It was important therefore to massively reduce the amount of alcohol that I was drinking.

Another reason why I had failed in my previous attempts to quit smoking, was possibly due to spending too much time with other people who smoked. I decided that in this new quest, I would attempt to stay away from other smokers as much as I could. This was not that easy as quite a lot of my friends are smokers. I had to be determined and make sacrifices. What I am attempting to do could have a very positive affect on my life, I therefore have to have the courage to do everything in my power that I think will help to lead to a successful conclusion.

I hope this article acts as an inspiration for other people to stop smoking.